Building your family through both biological children and adoption is so awesome! It is impossible to convey what a powerful and beautiful thing it is to meet your child for the first time -- whether it's in a hospital room or on the other side of the planet.
It also presents some new challenges and emotional dynamics. When we left for China, my youngest baby Landry was two and a half. She knew her new "sister" was coming, but like any youngest she didn't fully understand what that would mean to the pecking order.
Laney, on the other hand, was just happy as a peach to meet Troy & I and thought, "Wow! This is it! Finally, after having to fight and scrap my way to some attention, I finally have a mom and dad who are fully focused on me and my needs. I'm lovin' this!"
When Laney's world crashed into Landry's world (not to mention Lily & Colby in the mix as well!), there was some pretty intense emotion for those first several weeks. Lots of jealousy and crying and competition. I wondered if my arms would fall off. I was pretty much having to hold both of them --- constantly. And if I wasn't holding them both, they were each hanging on an arm...trying to RIP me in half.
My heart ached at times, for the displacement Landry must be feeling. She wasn't just moved into a middle-kid position by a newborn, but by another toddler! Only 11 months younger than she. And then I would cry for Laney. This sweet, amazing baby who thought she had finally found people who would make her feel as special and prioritized as she should be...only to discover that this same couple has THREE other kids who need attention too.
Ugh. It hasn't all been pretty. For the most part, our first six months with Laney have been incredible. And I know that compared to lots of families, our transition has been blissfully smooth. Laney has shown a really stunning capability for attachment and she is a happy, healthy baby. Landry is going to turn 3 next month and she is growing up too. And Mommy is getting a better handle on how to focus on each of them individually (giving them that critical 1-on-1 time) each week, but also how to mediate times when they are both just being jealous and spiteful.
All in all, God is good and everything is evening out. And I snapped this picture yesterday, while these two precious sisters were snuggled on the couch watching their favorite new movie, Mariposa. Landry doesn't have Laney in a death-grip. Laney isn't about to fall asleep. They were just happily, peacefully cuddled up (for at least 20 minutes!) spending time together. It really melted my heart. We are definitely making progress.....
